One of my dearest friends, Amy, started a blog when she went to teach in Honduras for a year. She continues to write, ponder, and pray through her blog while she teaches in Mission, SD and experiences life on the ‘rez’. This summer she is back in our home town managing the swimming pool where her and I were life-guards together during high school and college. We both love to swim, we both love God, and we both fear sinking.
Alexa, Amy, & I. When we weren’t at the pool, we were at the lake!
Faith is Like Swimming.
– Originally posted by Amy
Maybe I’m working too much and have lost my mind, but the other day teaching swimming lessons I had this weird epiphany. Faith, is like swimming. I have had to teach swimming lessons to almost every kind of kid. From the kind that is terrified of the water all the way to the kind that jumps right in. No fear. Obviously those no fear kids are what I prefer – they are a little easier to teach. I’ve quit social media. Not for long, but I had to. Or felt I had to. My mind was always on Facebook or Twitter or what someone was going to say to my post or whatever else. Too much junk in my mind. I felt God nudging me ‘Amy, spend more time with me’, ‘think about me’, ‘Give me your heart.’ It’s been interesting so far.
So while life-guarding I wasn’t thinking about facebook or twitter. I was thinking about this great God that wants me. I watched a little girl going off the diving board. She was scared and her mom was right below saying it was okay and that she would catch her. All she had to do was jump. I’ve had to coax many kids off the diving board. I’ve also pushed many kids off the diving board.
Thing is I never thought about how scared the kid actually is. Here is some person their parents are making them come see to learn how to swim. They are just expected to trust you to make sure they don’t drown. They don’t know me. They don’t know if I’m good at catching people or even if I’m good at my job. And I’m telling them to jump. Jump into the arms of some stranger. Trust me even if there is no reason to. Jump. Every time I get a kid to jump. I go over the top in the excitement department. I want them to know just how awesome they are for putting their trust in me and doing something that scared them.
Faith is like a diving board.
I’m standing on the edge of this diving board. This higher than the high dive diving board. And God is at the bottom saying “jump, I’ll catch you” And I don’t jump. I just stay put looking down thinking ‘I don’t really know you, I don’t really know if you will catch me. I’ve fallen a lot and you weren’t around to catch me then. What’s different now?’
Some kids having older siblings at the same time as their younger siblings swimming lesson. Once they see they are scared of jumping they tend to say something like “C’mon, it’s fun and easy! Just do it.’
I have friends that seem to have taken the plunge from this high dive and they also are at the bottom saying “Amy, it’s fun and easy! Just do it.” I see their smiles, their beautiful life, and their happiness. I want that. I need that. I yearn for that. Yet, I stay. Thinking, I can handle this by myself. I got this. I’m all independent and awesome I don’t need you.
Thing is jumping from this high dive isn’t a one time thing. It’s an every day thing. So some days I jump. I trust God to catch me.
Other days I don’t. Because today their is too much stuff to get done or that needs to go a certain way. I must have control over it. I like my control.
But everyday, I look down. and everyday God is there. Walking on water and saying jump. He never gives up on me. He never lets me down. And yet I don’t jump every time.
I’ve had a couple crazy no fear kids. Kids that didn’t fully realize they can’t touch every where and they can’t swim. They kind of needed me, although they didn’t want to need me. So I’m taking this girl to the diving board and I’m not there yet to catch her and she jumps and sinks. She doesn’t pop back up like most kids do….she starts sinking to the bottom of the 12 feet. I don’t even have time to panic I just dive down and go get her. She terrified me, I thought for sure she was going to be scarred for life. I get her above water and after she coughs some of the water out she says to me “I want to do that again” I just laugh, because she doesn’t realize what could have happened. All she knows is that I’m there to protect her.
Sometimes, God lets you fall. It’s not that He can’t catch you, it’s not like He wasn’t ready for you. But we have to learn somehow. Sometimes you sink. It might be for a long time or a short time, but no matter how long – God will also dive in and bring you back to the surface. Always.
So, maybe I’m not scared of the jump. I’m scared of the sinking. I just need to learn from that little girl though. Even if I sink I just have to say “I want to do that again” because God always comes to rescue you. Every time you sink you learn something new. You grow and become the person God created you to be. You learn something that helps you glorify God.
Maybe sinking is the blessing we never knew we needed.
I’m hoping to become a person with a child like faith and a no fear attitude.